Author Topic: My adoption story  (Read 1515 times)

clare low

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My adoption story
« on: June 16, 2017, 11:02:04 am »
It is bad enough being adopted - rejected by your parent - only to end up with a horrid adoptive parent.

Carolinem

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #1 on: August 01, 2017, 03:19:56 pm »
Totally agree. It's very confusing as a child (or an adult for that matter) to understand why on earth I was adopted in the first place. I was told it was my father's decision, but he never got his own way, my mother was totally dominant, so how come they adopted? Maybe it was feelings of inadequacy as she could not have children. I was told she didn't want a girl, that it was my fault he died (I was 15 when he died of a hereditary heart condition) and  when was i going to just go away. Then she sold the house and left me to find a flat. No help, financial or otherwise.

RHS

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #2 on: December 17, 2017, 10:07:18 am »
I was adopted as baby along with my twin brother. My mother was unable to love me unconditionally I always feel I’m the wrong pea in the pod, she is incredibly bright when it was obvious I was not of the same intelligence she would be critical of my achievements. I found listening to Jeremy Vines programme  a huge relief to know I am not the only person to have suffered with being bought up by a controlling & self centred mother.

steved

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #3 on: December 17, 2017, 10:19:13 am »
Oddly enough when I was younger and the frequent target of my biological mothers ire I used to genuinely wish I had been adopted and that outhere  some place was a mother who did care for me.

Jennifer

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #4 on: December 18, 2017, 02:11:55 pm »
Are you sure we aren’t twins Steve separated at birth , I always wished I had been adopted and that my life could be so different , when my parents argued I prayed for a divorce and that I could go with my dad and he could meet someone else , someone kind

clare low

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2017, 03:58:21 pm »


Hi

It's really sad that you wish you were adopted and had different parents.  It highlights for me just how uncomfortable you were at home.

Luckily it seems you get on well with your father.  Hang on to this as a lifeline.

Best wishes

Angela

clare low

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #6 on: December 19, 2017, 04:06:19 pm »


I am so glad that your found my chat with Jeremy helpful in dealing with your difficult situation.

Just what I wanted to happen.

Best

Angela

Jennifer

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #7 on: December 21, 2017, 05:38:32 am »
Thank you for you reply Angela you have no idea what a wonderful thing you have done for us on this site, we are as Steve’s said broken souls in need of repair and you have done so much healing for me this last week.
My father died 10 yrs ago sorry I didn’t make it clear but I would have gone with my dad as he was the lesser of 2 evils.
 This week has been life changing and I will be forever grateful at you coming forward and speaking to Jeremy 

Love Jennifer
« Last Edit: December 21, 2017, 05:41:46 am by Jennifer »

steved

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #8 on: December 22, 2017, 09:40:07 pm »
I have noted in my life and among some other broken souls that whilst one parent was almost the cevil incarnate the other was often mild, meak, often remote from the kids involved, Not evil or bad in themselves but not having the will or strength to stop the other parent from tormenting us.

Aye Jenny you DO sound like the sister I wished I had, someone with a soul and empathy.

Jennifer

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #9 on: December 28, 2017, 02:40:45 pm »
Yes Steve it follows a pattern regularly , that’s the problem my dad didn’t have the guts to stand  up to her, maybe if he had I wouldn’t have the issues I have had for 25 yrs so much our parents have to answer to .
Lol pity we don’t live near one another a good chat would do us good
« Last Edit: December 28, 2017, 02:42:38 pm by Jennifer »

steved

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #10 on: December 29, 2017, 08:09:33 pm »
Thank you for you reply Angela you have no idea what a wonderful thing you have done for us on this site, we are as Steve’s said broken souls in need of repair and you have done so much healing for me this last week.
My father died 10 yrs ago sorry I didn’t make it clear but I would have gone with my dad as he was the lesser of 2 evils.
 This week has been life changing and I will be forever grateful at you coming forward and speaking to Jeremy 

Love Jennifer

When my father developed cancer he spent his final year at home slowly fading away, but when ever we went to see him my mother would ensure that she was the focus of attention by creating scenes or feigning illness. 

steved

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #11 on: December 29, 2017, 08:11:29 pm »
Yes Steve it follows a pattern regularly , that’s the problem my dad didn’t have the guts to stand  up to her, maybe if he had I wouldn’t have the issues I have had for 25 yrs so much our parents have to answer to .
Lol pity we don’t live near one another a good chat would do us good

If you ever travel north of York Jenny shout out, I would love to meet you, ( somewhere neutral and safe of course)  Steve

Jennifer

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #12 on: December 30, 2017, 06:44:19 pm »
Ha ha Steve I’m south of York Leeds actually but yes that would be nice 👍🏻

Doneforever

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Re: My adoption story
« Reply #13 on: January 27, 2019, 04:33:49 am »
I can so relate. Dealing with my adoptive step father tonight and the jarring comment he made about my resume on LinkedIn that he and my mother laughed at it.